Dogs!

The Dog, pictured left, is a very dark black dog. He is also a high speed dog.

Some dogs might do leaping and diving into water, some might do carrying out the biggest stick, some  might even do walking along sedately stopping for the occasional sniff.

Not Mido.

Mido does high speed zooming, preferably after a rabbit or a fox (yes, I know it's illegal, by try telling that to a dog. He never catches them though...) or even, famously, after an otter we didn't know we had living nearby.

If none of the above are available he will just zoom about aimlessly which is fine until he collides with the back of your knees making you sit down smartly on your bottom usually in something wet and muddy. This happens with far too much regularity - especially in the dark - which is why OH bought The Dog a High Viz jacket.

Now, when it's dark and rainy as it often is in the summer November, The Dog gets to wear his disco jacket and at least you get to see what's hit you the split second before it does.

Except this morning when it was dark and raining and the Man of the House was doing what is His Job*, ie heading out into the dark with The Dog to put the bins out and feed the elderly pony. While he was attending to the latter The Dog shot off after a rabbit and the MoftheH picked out flash of bright High Viz blur with the beam of his head torch as The Dog leapt over our boundary fence and into our neighbour's land.

Moments later the MoftheH was assailed in the dark by invisible black dog minus aforementioned Hi Viz jacket. The vital garment is now officially listed as Missing In Action and the guilty party is now in The Doghouse.

* I should add that my job as Woman of the House is to stay in bed until the slightly more sociable hour of 7am, attend to the needs of the dishwasher and drink coffee until 7.30am by which time I will have turned back into something that can be spoken to and respond with some degree of civility.